Toy Dolls - Cloughy Is A Bootboy!

Cloughy's lads are full o' gloom

Coz Cloughy's in the changin' room

Why can't he nick off and leave them be?

He screams and yells and just because

Cloughy knows that he's the boss

Cloughy's rough and tough Cloughy's barmy

Cloughy's in a huff and tense

Cloughy's teeth begin to clench

A Cloughy fan asks for his autograph... "Can yer sign this Brian?"

He nuts him first and smacks him next

Nobody makes Cloughy vexed

Cloughy is the chief Cloughy's the Gaffa

Cloughy is a football hooligan

Now Cloughy's only at his prime

With his fist in yer nose

When the referee blows full time

Brian Brian

Kicks and slaps and he shouts Oi

Brian Brian

Cloughy is a bootboy

The judge tells Cloughy to keep calm

He's up for Grevous Bodily Harm

Cloughy stands and begins to yell

Cloughy must have a screw loose

Coz Cloughy says he's gonna cruc

Ify the cops when he gets out the cell

Cloughy is a football hooligan

Now Cloughy's only at his prime

With his fist in yer nose

When the referee blows full time

Brian Brian

Cloughy is a bootboy

Cloughy is a football hooligan

Now Cloughy's only at his prime

With his fist in yer nose

When the referee blows full time

Brian Brian

Kicks and slaps and he shouts Oi

Brian Brian

Cloughy is a bootboy

Brian Brian

Kicks and slaps and he shouts Oi

Brian Brian

Cloughy is a bootboy

He kicks and slaps

He thumps and cracks

He nuts and smacks and shouts Oi

Toy Dolls - There`s A Trollop Up Elmwood Street

I'd walk across the M.1
I'd trek through the Amazon
I'd be a spanish matador
Now't would be too risky for me

I'd loop the loop in a Jumbo
I'd box with Frankie Bruno
I could do anything, dance in a lions den
But I'm never gonna
Walk up Elmwood Street again

There's a slag, there's a trollop up Elmwood Street
A man's not safe to walk up there alone
A dirty bag, there's a trollop up Elmwood Street
There's a tart, bag, slut, slag, trollop, up Elmwood Street

I'd fence with a sword that was blunt
I'd hitch a lift from James Hunt
I could do anything, dance in a lions den
But I'm never gonna
Walk up Elmwood Street again

There's a slag, there's a trollop up Elmwood Street
A man's not safe to walk up there alone
A dirty bag, there's a trollop up Elmwood Street
There's a tart, bag, slut, slag, trollop, up Elmwood Street

There's a slag, there's a trollop up Elmwood Street
A man's not safe to walk up there alone
A dirty bag, there's a trollop up Elmwood Street
There's a tart, bag, slut, slag, trollop, up Elmwood Street
Say no more!

Toy Dolls - One Night in Moscow (and We'll Be Russian Home!)

We had to book a holiday,
But we were sick o'Whitley bay
We fancied the Mediterranean.
All the vacancies had gone,
That's all the vacancies but one
A Vacancy for which we didn't plan.

What could we do?
We could hitch,
A ride back home from moskvitch
We had to stay
& face the cost
& sunbathe in the russian frost.

One, one, one, one night in Moscow,
& we'll be russian home
One, one, one, one night in Moscow
I'll be Russian, you'll be russian,
We'll all be russian home!

The brochure said it's nice
& warm, you need no Russian uniform
We had the flu & caught a Russian cough,
No fish n'chips or decent pubs,
We called the hotel Wormwood Scrubs
We said we would complain to Gorbochof.

We couldn't find a disco anywhere,
No McDonald's or a wimpy in Red Square
We Must have been potty
To have gone to the Soviet Union.

One, one, one, one night in Moscow,
& we'll be russian home...

For a pint & Coronation Street
Russian home...
A Bacon Sarny & as much as we can eat
Russian home!!!

One, one, one, one night in Moscow,
& we'll be russian home
One, one, one, one night in Moscow
I'll be Russian, you'll be russian,
We'll all be russian home!

Toy Dolls - Lester Fiddled The Tax Man

Yeahhhhhh!!!

Under Under Starters Under Starters orders
& there off Tallyho!
4-1 3-1 2-1 The bettin's on,
Lester Nicks off to Rio
He got more, got more than he bargained for,
Lester's accountant was a daft clot
He's upset, upset, that's what you get,
He made a mockery of Ascot... Ascot... Ascot...

Lester, Lester,
A fiddliddliddling jester
Lester's been banged up
With all the others cccccroocks
Lester, Lester,
Tried to trick the tax inspector
Coz Lester conned the tax
& fiddled his books.

He's a nutcase, nutcase,
Crackpot nutcase,
He put his job in jeopardy
Now he won't be,
Won't be, won't be,
Won't be racing again at aintree
He'll get away, get away,
Get away, get away,
He must o' been livin' in dreamland
Now he's never on, never on,
Never on, never on...
World of Sport or Grandstand...
Grandstand... Grandstand...

Lester, Lester,
A fiddliddliddling jester
Lester's been banged up
With all the others cccccroocks
Lester, Lester,
Tried to trick the tax inspector
Coz Lester conned the tax
& fiddled his books.

He laughs, he laughs,
He sniggers & laughs,
When he thinks of the money he earns
But he got knicked, got nicked ,
Got nicked, when he sent his tax returns
Grinning, grinning, always winning,
He never thought he would be poor
Now he's locked up, locked up,
Locked up, locked up, Doing time in...
Dartmoor, Dartmoor, Dartmoor...

Lester, Lester,
A fiddliddliddling jester
Lester's been banged up
With all the others cccccroocks
Lester, Lester,
Tried to trick the tax inspector
Coz Lester conned the tax
& fiddled his books.